Yujiro Taniyama & the Japan Broadcasting . net Corporation【JB】Editorial Team
A Geisha is an artist, not a hooker.
Although ludicrously still pretty often misunderstood by even the most ingenious travelers from the West and abroad, this is an irrefutable fact. One had to be, and has to be (although its population is now meagre) extremely shrewd and dexterous in conversing, corresponding, dancing, Shamisen-playing (not ‘sumimasen’) as well as in poetic writing should she become an authentic Geisha of piquancy and charm. According to the late eminent columnist Natsuhico Yamamoto, ‘a certain Ozashiki (tatami ball rooms) latently approved sensual encounters’ – but that was the case for C grade harlot-Geisha.
A truly sophisticated A grade Geisha (or B) in the Edo period (1603-1868), however, were more of an illustrious and luxurious kind, de facto an ‘Ingrid Bergman’ in the 1940’s and ‘Grace Kelly’ in the 50’s. Aesthetic lark of intelligence with them could end up in corporeal delight if fortunate, but apparently the latter wasn’t taken for granted. The customer, or the ‘guest’, first of all had to be shrewd (not screwed); armed with miscellaneous knowledge and wisdom; should he successfully convince (lure) the most revered Geisha to undo her nickers. Unsurprisingly, moreover, an exorbitant amount of money was necessary to enjoy the entertainers’ flamboyant yet witty company; which meant that only the very rich had the prerogative to enter the hugely ostentatious society.
Now, having said all that, we are incredibly delighted this morning to announce the launch of our unprecedented ‘Daily Milk Delivery’ – THE MORNING GOOLIES.
G: Generative. Galvanize. Gusto. Galaxy. Giappone. Geisha. Genius. Glorious.
OO: Haicoo（俳句）. Senryoo（川柳）. Yama-Oota（狂歌 – Kyoo-ka）. pOem & rOmp.
L: Libido. Lenient. Lingam. Laughable.
I: Improvisation, inspiration. Intellectual. Indestructible. Infancy. Impropriety.
E: Energy. Exultation. Esoteric.
S: Sarasvati (The Buddhist-Hindoo Goddess of art, lust & fortune). Sharing. Scrumptious!
Ununderstandable as it may sound to some prudish hockey moms and senile pedagogues, GOOLIES is an acronym that describes the magical hybrid of miscellaneous poetic categories;
- Haicoo (haiku) that emphasizes「季節」- seasons.
- Senryoo (senryu) that depicts 「人」 – people.
- Yama-Oota (kyoo-ka) that flourished in mid-Edo era; a valorous lyrical style based on 「笑いと機智」 – laughter and wit. The rule, unlike the other two was that there were none.
THE MORNING GOOLIES, therefore, is in a way like a ‘morning tabloid’ aimed and destined to become a playful verbal adventure that mocks and jeers anything authoritarian. Importantly portrays anything unimportant. Initially launched on February 15th, 2022 as ‘The Daily Haicoomonger’, two months on we have unanimously decided to change the title for the better.
Lastly, truth today is indistinguishable from propaganda. And as lies need frequent debunking, GOO-LIES shall do so occasionally from the viewpoint of the famously un-opinionated Land of the Rising Phallos (Festival). Where does Giappone stand in the world today? Is our ‘homogeneous nation’ truly indispensable for modern civilization?!
That, too is the question.
Good lies are everywhere in the modern Floating World, almost just around every corner. Should the poet, or the romper Yujiro Taniyama (JB Editor in Chief) be mangled by thugs, poisoned by tyrant’s Novichok or put behind bars for erroneous allegations of subversion and corruption, we sincerely hope that such a predicament will in consequence instigate a moral wakening for the incorruptible reader.
Domo Arigato, and thank you very much.
※ Spiritual demigods and AI robots contributed to this article.