8 Reasons why Japan must obtain Nuclear Weapons. This is no MANGA, fellas

 

This is not a new episode of NARUTO, DORAEMON or YOUR NAME IS.

That’s right, it’s real.

North Korea’s autocratic regime “successfully” tested their latest ‘Hydrogen Bomb’ yesterday (Sept. 3). Congratulations Mr Kim, I think you have done it once again.

You are indeed fat, inexplicable and brave.

North Korea can now inflict violence on Japan using the world’s deadliest weapon.

If you live in Europe or North America I assume that you do not feel their repugnant provocation directly through your skin. 6 days ago the North launched its proud Hwasong-12 missile (meaning Mars) ‘over our mainland’, freaking us out.

The peace loving, unthinking flock of sheep in Tokyo and across the whole nation had their diapers all wet in despair. (Including myself, shame)

The situation in East Asia is escalating rapidly to a crucial level, starring the ruthless barbarian (Mr Kim). I am currently based in Tokyo, which is one of the ‘main targets’ for his men since the world’s largest mega-city is also a ‘home’ for over 130 U.S bases and military facilities, which is of course by far too many to my understanding. (You may be surprised by this hilarious fact already)

 

“All options are on the table” for Washington. Trump tweeted “North Korea is dangerous”, as always. But personally I do play down the ‘pre-emtive strike’ narrative by the U.S, since it is synonymous for the annihilation of Seoul – a city of 10 million.

But of course, it could happen. Hiroshima did happen, and so did Nagasaki.

That being said, probably learning from history means that we have to imagine the unimaginable.

Predict the unpredictable.

I repeat. Pyongyang is an imminent threat. Albeit being the most peaceful man on the face of the earth and also as a timid, shy Japanese national, my argument is that Tokyo should, and must posess its own nuclear weapons.

What? To wage war on China? Well, to be honest we are too ‘old’ for that. Please bear in mind that one out of every four Japanese are now aged over 65.

As the taste of Ramen changes frequently, so should the security stategy. An ‘accidental’ war could be trigerred at any moment in the areas surrounding the Sea of Japan. This is neither a Manga, ONE PIECE or an Anime, meaning that to obtain a new ‘Samurai Sword’ has now become Tokyo’s ultimate priority.

Here are 8 reasons why.

 

 

1. ‘U.S nuclear deterrent’ is unfortunately not working. This fact has been proven by the fact North Korea has already gone nuclear. As a big fan of MLB (and Ichiro), I do count on the world’s most powerful military with a stunning $600 billion annual budget. But even their super pricy ‘nuclear umbrella’ could not prevent Pyongyang going nuclear. Let’s face it.

 

 

2. Absolute deterrent against Pyongyang.  Tokyo desperately needs a feasible deterrent in order to SURVIVE. If NK’s nukes become eligible (in a couple of months) to strike L.A or N.Y, it is highly likely Trump will ‘strike a deal’ with Kim allowing the posession of SRBMs such as Nodong and Tepodong missiles, on the condition they abandon ICBMs – meaning the end of U.S nuclear deterrence for Japan.

 

 

3. BALANCE OF POWER. Besides, the current S.Korean government led by Mun is ultra liberal, with an extremely soft stance on the North. Furthermore, a ‘Unified Korea’ within the next two decades shall also mean ‘Nuclear Korea’. That being said, Tokyo with nukes will neutralize the region. Japan has 46.9 metric tons of plutonium stockpiled (2016), with the capacity to build 5,000 nukes.

 

 

4. ‘9th AMENDMENT’ – About time the ‘Flock of sheep’ claim responsibility for it’s own safety, instead of acting like a panting puppy of Washington (like the U.K) –  Japan has become a ‘burden’ for America as Trump had claimed at a CNN interview in March, 2016 if my memory is correct (“They must pay more for defense, they should defend on its own against N.Korea, U.S is bankrupt with $21 trillion!”, he said, remember?). It is a well known fact that the Japanese are obsessed with ‘nuclear allergy’ due to its traumatic past of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. However, under the current circumstances the ‘unthinkable’ is thinkable. If the Japanese are not dumb, posessing nuclear bombs may also lead to amending the ‘Manga Constitution Article 9’ in the next general election (expected in 2018) – obtaining offensive capability which is currently prohibited under the U.S made 1946 constitution.

 

 

5. SENKAKU ISLANDS. Regional power China is flexing its military muscles daily infiltrating the territorial waters of Japan’s Senkaku Islands. Just like their military buildup in the S.China sea and the reclamation of artificial islands, Beijing is preparing for a direct invasion of the Senkakus which is highly likely to trigger WW3. Nuclear armed Tokyo shall definitely contribute to regional stability. Also remember, we of course do not kidnap human rights lawyers.

 

6. U.S WILL NOT ‘DEFEND’ JAPAN RISKING IT’s MAINLAND. Machiavellism. National interest. That’s how politics work. Don’t get me wrong, I am no anti-American. It’s all the Japanese’s fault that we have been overly dependent and subservient in its relationship with the U.S. I repeat, WE are to blame.

 

7. Non-Proliferation Treaty/Strategy is dead. I do condone the latest moves by 122 brave nations that signed a historic treaty to ban nuclear bombs, but  Kim’s recent nukes/missile tests have invalidated the whole process.  John Lennon’s ‘Imagine’ is a true classic, but the time for hypocrisy is over. Besides, the P5 will never abandon their prerogatives.

 

 

8. Please think for yourself. You are by far smarter than me.

 

 

 

Btw, I saw a brilliant comedy starring Robert De Niro, Sean Penn and Demi Moore last night.

 

That’s right, “We’re No Angels”.

 

Thank you.

 

 

 

Yujiro Taniyama – Editor in Chief, Japan Broadcasting

 

 

 

‘Fat Turd’ Kim Jong un’s mother was ‘Made in Osaka’

130 kg.

That’s how much he allegedly weighs.

Pretty heavy, to be honest.

1300 km.

That’s the distance from Pyongyang to Tokyo.

Pretty close, to be honest. ICBM shall strike the world’s largest capital of 38 million in less than ten minutes.

Whether the ‘Fat Turd’ (FT) is a smart-cookie or not as hailed by Trump, he indisputably is a huge menace to Japan as well as Asia as a whole.

Of course, we are referring to the ruthless, reckless Pyongyang dictator Kim Jong un.

FT never goes to the gym.

All he does is eat, drink, kill and excrete.

But still, the international media is totally dominated by this Fatty. Not a day goes by without the rockstars ‘FT & Donald’.

Should North Korea be obliterated, he won’t dare take the risks to continue the nuke tests, pundits say.

I don’t believe so.

FT is an enigma.

His mother Ko yong hee’s birthplace is a state secret, to begin with. The AERA magazine, published by Japan’s liberal Asahi newspaper reported back in 2012 that FT (not the Financial Times) ‘s mother was born in Tsiruhashi, Osaka in 1952. Ethnically Korean, she was purportedly a “Zainichi Nisei” (2nd generation Korean residing in Japan) according to quite a few Japanese medias.

As the third wife of the late Kim Jong il, she had three children, and the notorious FT was the second son.

The other Fatty gentleman that was murdered at KLIA recently was FT’s half brother. They had a different mom.

‘Donald Kim’ alliance

While the famously unpopular U.S president’s polls suggest only three out of ten Americans support the man, FT has the backing of 100% of its citizens.

I mean, the North Koreans are deprived of their basic voting rights. Therefore, ostensibly FT enjoys full support from its 25 million citizens.

That’s a stark contrast, isn’t it?!

Hollywood actor Robert De Niro is adamant when he rebukes Trump as a ‘stupid dog’. His coherent stance is pretty much remarkable compared to Mitt Romney for example, who called Trump a ‘phoney’ during the election but later became a panting puppy after Hillary was ousted.

Others in the business seem to have no guts to mock the 45th president the way De Niro does, and I adore the ‘Taxi driver’ for that.

‘Fat Turd’ Kim Jong un is by no means a ‘smart cookie’ as depicted by Trump. I firmly believe he is nothing but an inexplicable, spoiled 130kg dumbass who’s serious only about how to alleviate his feeling of hunger when his people are eating shoes.

Hilariously, Tokyo is a puppet of Trump. The complacency of we the Japanese is staggering, without a single thought on ‘how to face the grave military aggression of not only FT, but also Beijing and Moscow’ in the years to come.

Today is the national constitution day. May 3. It marks the 70th anniversary since our current constitution ‘Made by USA’ made a debut in the ruins of over 66 heavily bombed Japanese cities, leaving two million without a home.

I will not celebrate this day like other flock of sheep without balls, nor raise the Japanese flag.

The highly hypocritical ruling party LDP is yet to accomplish the revision of the contentious ‘article 9’ of the 1946 constitution in which they promised back in 1955. PM Abe and his comrades argue the need to do so ostensibly, but are not really serious about it, since it is by far easier and less risky to remain as the ‘dog on a leash’ – Trump Doggy , that is.

It is proven by the fact you hardly see LDP MP’s addressing the need to amend article 9 out in the open public, like Shibuya and Shinjuku.

I repeat.

LDP is not serious about it, nor are its citizens. So if you work for PLA or the Chinese Communist Party, don’t miss the chance, or you’ll regret it.

Dear readers, I’m by no means downplaying the Whitehorse. All I’m stressing is the need for Tokyo to beef up its sovereignty and military capability to face FT and its communist allies.

Because if we continue our ridiculous subservient attitude towards the US (since the present constitution came to effect on this very day, 70 years ago) , it will endanger not only the land of the rising sun but the ‘bankrupt’ United States of America itself.

‘Please defend us American mommy!’ – that’s been the orthodox, shameful attitude of the Japanese after WW2.

Boy, do we ever grow up.

Fat turd Kim Jong un’s mother was born in Osaka.

Bruce Springsteen was born in America.

The moment Trump or Kim launches a pre-emptive strike on its adversary, some serious consequences will occur. All Tokyo Disneyland, Universal Studios Osaka and Ko Young hee’s birthplace may be obliterated.

But probably that’s only when Tokyo will retain its genuine independence.

Or is post war Japan itself an American joke fellas?!

Let’s wait and see.

Good Rising!

Yujiro Taniyama

Japan Broadcasting – Editor in Chief