Kids show starting ‘The Glorious Fatty’
Kids show starting ‘The Glorious Fatty’
New kids show. For better understanding of the world we live in.
It seems as though he has done it once again.
The incumbent U.S President, for the first time in its post war history has officially announced that he will hold a dialogue with the North Korean despot. Given the fact that no sitting U.S President has ever met Pyongyang commander in chief in post WW2 history, yesterday’s announcement was indeed historic.
When the Korean War ended in 1953, it was not the Lee Syngman’s South Korean puppet regime but the “UN Allied powers” (de facto U.S military) that signed armistice with the North. As the Japanese have never signed a peace treaty with the Russians due to the prolonged territorial dispute in the “Northern Territories” adjacent to Hokkaido – Etorofu, Kunashiri, Habomai and Shikotan islands, the same goes with the Washington and Pyongyang.
“I want a peace treaty with you, Sir Donald” – Kim Jong un shall suggest in May.
Purportedly, Secretary of State Rex Tillerson and his comrades are skeptical of Kim Jong un “giving up it nuclear weapons” – and fiercely oppose Trump’s move to meet Kim “without preconditions”. Japan’s PM Shinzo Abe on the other hand, almost lost face when his “golf partner” suddenly announced to the press that he’ll meet the obese dictator – but was later revealed that Trump had called Abe right after he answered “Yes” to the South Korean counterpart visiting Washington.
As a Japanese national, I must say that it is a pure shame that while the Pyongyang nuke-warheads are locked onto Tokyo and Kyoto, we are virtually left out of the talks. Our overly subservient attitude towards Washington since our obsolete post war constitution was promulgated in 1947 undoubtedly is the primary factor why things are the way they are today.
Like the British former PM James Cameron was often mocked as the “Panting Puppy” of America, Tokyo unfortunately is nothing different.
Time for a change
Personally speaking, I condone the drastic move by Trump.
Though it is simply unthinkable that Kim will actually abandon his “Toy” (Nukes, of course), there still is about a 30% possibility that “something could change” – which I think is a positive thing. Change is always good, to my understanding.
The Tokyo-Pyongyang relationship had reached a point of ‘stalemate’ since Pyongyang tested its first “nuclear bomb” in 2006. Condolezza Rice and state department official Christopher Hill made a crucial mistake back in 2008, when they were overwhelmingly “Pro-North Korean” to lift the U.S sanctions imposed on Pyongyang under the Bush administration. (Without even consulting Tokyo)
But nothing changed.
Why!? Of course, North Korea is truly a master of repudiating “deals”.
And we all know that, don’t we!?
In 1994, Hillary’s husband was also duped. The Kim dynasty is truly a master of provocation, intimidation and deception. And the West was dumb enough to repeat the mistakes.
Then now comes Donald, the “Tough Negotiator”.
Will he be duped again!? Possibly. But one thing for certain is that Trump meeting Kim vindicates tough U.N sanctions strategy imposed on the North. That’s right, its working.
Though optimistic, I am not a prophet so whether or not a “striking a DEAL” will occur is yet unclear.
The “UNPREDICTABLES” (Trump and Kim) could call the whole thing off anytime. Yet based on the current vulnerable, unstable and combustible circumstances, let me suggest that should the “dialogue” take place, TOKYO would be the ideal host.
Here are 7 reasons why.
1. Tokyo is the “safest city” among the G7 nations. We all know that. You cant buy guns for $199 at Walmart here. And of course the U.S President’s security concern. By maintaining 2000 km distance from the Korean Peninsula, he shall be safe and sound, protected by the Japanese army and the 50,000 American troops (Including Mr. USS Ronald Regan in Yokosuka) stationed in Japan.
2. Geopolitically, Tokyo lies between the Asian continent and the North American. Beijing is eager to host the dialogue as the “rising global power” of course – but Kim fears being blown up on the railway track, just like his father was.
3. Fujiya Hotel in Hakone Onsen – about an hour car ride from Tokyo by Mt.Fuji is where the historic meeting should be held. JOHN LENNON used to visit this classic hotel established in 1878 following the renowned Meiji Restoration. The two leaders can send the message of “LOVE” and “IMAGINE” as they hop into the Onsen together fully naked. As the old Japanese saying “Hadacano Tsukiai” (Naked friendship, intimate as they take bath together) goes – the two fat guys in one boiling hot Rotenburo will dominate the headlines.
Kim can fly directly to Shizuoka Mt.Fuji Airport, then a car. That way his security will be guaranteed even further.
Trump on the other hand must use Tokyo Haneda Airport, and not Yokota as he had previously done. His entrance thorough a monstrous U.S base ( size equivalent to 157 Tokyo Domes!) will not only prove provocative to Kim, but a sitting U.S President entering Japan through the backdoor (defying the official, legal procedures) will only humiliate Tokyo as the ‘Colony of America’. (Remember, that any CIA spies or U.S government officials can enter and leave Japan through Yokota without leaving any legal record, which I believe is a concrete proof that my country is far from being defined as a sovereign nation. Sad!)
4. North Korean nukes are locked on to Tokyo. Therefore, Kim should show his credibility to “abandon Nukes” at least by setting his foot on the “targeted soil”. He’s got to impress the world that he’s got the balls.
5. DMZ is by far too risky. We’ve got to bear in mind that there are over 1,000,000 troops on stand-by across the border on the other side. Should some sort of “accident” occur, Mr Trump will be a dead meat. No escape.
6. Trump wants to ‘strike a deal’ ahead of November’s U.S midterm election. And that could mean enforcing Kim to abandon ICBMs that can reach the U.S mainland (N.Y Trump Tower, his home), but on the other hand acknowledging Pyongyang’s short-range missiles that is capable of striking Shibuya’s Hachico Dog in merely 8 minutes.
That’s unacceptable to say the least, and surely undermine the “top notch relationship” among the allies. And in order to avoid such a unilateral move by Donald, Tokyo must put strong pressure on the “Wig Man”.
7. The Japanese today are nothing but a flock of sheep these days. By holding direct talks in its capitol, it may work as a remedy to wake up the emasculated nation unaware of the imminent threats not only from the North but by far more powerful neighbors Xi Jinping the ‘indefinite ruler Pooh” and Vladimir “Machoman” Putin.
In order to maintain peace and balance within the region, it would be crucial for the descendants of the proud Samurais to have concerns over global issues by abandoning its insular mindedness. Remember fellas, all our neighbors possess nukes, whether as we do not. Where’s our ‘nuclear deterrent’ ？ Oh, Mr. Flip-flop?
To be blunt, that is pretty risky.
Should any contingency occur on the peninsula, S.China sea or Senkaku – WW3 could break out. Who knows!?
Yujiro Taniyama – Japan Broadcasting . net Editor in Chief
His daughter is “As dumb as a brick” – according to his “sloppy” former aide Steve Bannon. (Book: “Fire and Fury”)
Fox News owner Rupert Murdoch purpotedly labelled him as “A charlatan and a fool”.
But still, he is the kingmaker of our world today.
And of course, his name is Donald……..not the duck but Trump.
While “Winnie the Pooh” Xi Jinping has successfully hypnotised his fellow Communist comrades to allow him to rule China indefinitely, the notorious censorship of the authoritarian regime has forbidden its citizens from even searching the word “Pooh” on the internet.
What a creepy nation.
I am honestly happy that I wasn’t born in Shanghai.
The crackdown on the Tibetans, Uighurs and the Mongolians by the Beijing despot is also nothing new. Cultural genocides, the massive surveillance operations using thousands of CCTV cameras and the assimilation policy (forcing Chinese education system on the ‘aliens’) is no doubt killing the ethnicity of all the tribes.
If you don’t believe me, just go ask His Holiness the Dalai Lama the 14th.
Who cares on whether Ivanka is dumb or not!?
To be blunt, she is strikingly beautiful. Especially compared to her brother – who looks nothing but a hairy gorilla from Ueno zoo. Probably he’s biologically half Russian.
Btw, I had attended the “Pyonyang Olympics” 2018, which ended last week. The Outspoken Samurai had prepared for the worst, yes a nuclear war during the games (though forgot to purchase a gas mask made in China in advance), but fortunately it did not happen. But as Donald’s little man Mike Pence had warned, the Pyeongchang was truly a “political olympics” – used as a propaganda tool by the super fatty Kim Jong un and his friends.
As the world continued to give (during the games) an incredulous look towards the late Kim Jong Il’s youngest son who assasinated his half brother over a year ago in KL, the Seoul government’s Mun Jae in was extremely passionate to develop a close rapport with the fatty.
The ultra-left Mun government is so pro-North Korean Donald the Trump and his republican comrades must all be agitated banging their heads against the walls of the Whitehouse every morning.
A “Nuclear Pyongyang” is truly a nightmare, especially when Mr Kim has already developed an ICBM that can reach Tokyo is just 7 minutes or so. The famous Tsukiji’s sashimis and sushis as well as Tokyo Disneyland’s Donald the Duck will all be annihilated a way before we know that we’re all dead.
That being said, my understanding is that Japan needs to beef up its military capacity and that fast. History has proven that a war could be easily triggered by trivial matters, be it the assasination of Franz Ferdinand of Austria and his sweetheart Sophie on 28th June, 1914.
I went to a golf hitting range this morning, and struck 90 balls.
If you want to challenge me fellas, send me an invitation via JB’s website. Some people say that I’m a hell of a golfer with monstrous power of Zeus – that can hit 300 yards with 3 wood. But you see, due to the fact my political stance tilts to the right rather than to the left, often does the ball too.
Tokyo’s PM Shinzo Abe is an avid golfer unlike myself, who’s probably a fake. And Abe occasinally enjoys playing 18 holes with Donald the Golfer.
“Make the alliance even greater!” – was the original golf cap Shinzo made for Donald about 5 months ago when the latter visited Tokyo on his Asia tour. The slogan certainly did not impress me, because I could easily acknowledge how Shinzo was trying to cajole Donald on Pyongyang. But it just didn’t look cool, and from that point on (the moment the U.S President wore the cap and fled off to the golf course in suburban Tokyo), the Prime Minister of Japan had turned into a mere caddie of Donald the golfer.
In reality, we need Pentagon’s military support to maintain our sovereignty. There’s no doubt about that. Japan-U.S defence treaty is unshakable, as far as I am concerned. However at the same time, I find it absolutly shameful how the country I was born must rely on a third party (Ally – is such a pretty sounding word!) to defend itself. And it is undeniable that’s the sole reason why Shinzo must play the role of a “Pierrot” caddie.
Don’t take me wrong.
I do cherish the 7 decades old “Tomodachi friendship” with Washington.
Seven years ago, when a magnitude 9.0 earthquake struck northeastern part of Japan on March 11, subsequently leading to that devastating Tsunami and Fukushima nuclear disaster – USS Ronald Regan and my fellow American servicemen stationed in Japan (approx.47,000) immidiately headed to the Tsunami hit areas in the face of radioactive risks.
Only a true ally ( not fake) could take such an action.
And while Japan today is surely in a predicament over North Korea’s nuclear threat as well as the emerging Chinese military aggression in the region, the “caddie” in reality has no choice other than to count on the “golfer”.
But in conclusion, I cannot but help argue that its about time the habitants of the Japan archipelago get up on its own feet, and start proving that they are actually the proud descendents of the Samurais who had never succumbed to external force be it Ginghis Khan or the Russians. To my understanding, the “True Samurais” led by the famous Admiral Togo de facto perished in 1905 as the Empire of Japan prevailed over the Russian Empire.
The rest is history.
More than a hundred years on since the victorious Battle of Tsushima, the Samurais are dead. The Japanese today are emasculated, overwhelmingly timid like a flock of Aussie lambs.
If Kevin Spacey actually, and forcefully grabbed the crotch of young boys, “Winnie the Pooh” is also preparing to do the same on “Tokyo boys” – only to find that there are none; I mean yeah, the balls. In the latest survey of 2015, only 11% of the Japanese today have the guts and patriotism to fight for their nation in case of war – by far the lowest among the G7 nations.
Unfortunately, its we, the Japanese that are as “dumb as a brick”, not Ivanka.
Oh Donald the daddy, can I be the caddie of your daugher sir?!
Yujiro Taniyama – Japan Broadcasting.net Editor in Chief
That’s how much he allegedly weighs.
Pretty heavy, to be honest.
That’s the distance from Pyongyang to Tokyo.
Pretty close, to be honest. ICBM shall strike the world’s largest capital of 38 million in less than ten minutes.
Whether the ‘Fat Turd’ (FT) is a smart-cookie or not as hailed by Trump, he indisputably is a huge menace to Japan as well as Asia as a whole.
Of course, we are referring to the ruthless, reckless Pyongyang dictator Kim Jong un.
FT never goes to the gym.
All he does is eat, drink, kill and excrete.
But still, the international media is totally dominated by this Fatty. Not a day goes by without the rockstars ‘FT & Donald’.
Should North Korea be obliterated, he won’t dare take the risks to continue the nuke tests, pundits say.
I don’t believe so.
FT is an enigma.
His mother Ko yong hee’s birthplace is a state secret, to begin with. The AERA magazine, published by Japan’s liberal Asahi newspaper reported back in 2012 that FT (not the Financial Times) ‘s mother was born in Tsiruhashi, Osaka in 1952. Ethnically Korean, she was purportedly a “Zainichi Nisei” (2nd generation Korean residing in Japan) according to quite a few Japanese medias.
As the third wife of the late Kim Jong il, she had three children, and the notorious FT was the second son.
The other Fatty gentleman that was murdered at KLIA recently was FT’s half brother. They had a different mom.
‘Donald Kim’ alliance
While the famously unpopular U.S president’s polls suggest only three out of ten Americans support the man, FT has the backing of 100% of its citizens.
I mean, the North Koreans are deprived of their basic voting rights. Therefore, ostensibly FT enjoys full support from its 25 million citizens.
That’s a stark contrast, isn’t it?!
Hollywood actor Robert De Niro is adamant when he rebukes Trump as a ‘stupid dog’. His coherent stance is pretty much remarkable compared to Mitt Romney for example, who called Trump a ‘phoney’ during the election but later became a panting puppy after Hillary was ousted.
Others in the business seem to have no guts to mock the 45th president the way De Niro does, and I adore the ‘Taxi driver’ for that.
‘Fat Turd’ Kim Jong un is by no means a ‘smart cookie’ as depicted by Trump. I firmly believe he is nothing but an inexplicable, spoiled 130kg dumbass who’s serious only about how to alleviate his feeling of hunger when his people are eating shoes.
Hilariously, Tokyo is a puppet of Trump. The complacency of we the Japanese is staggering, without a single thought on ‘how to face the grave military aggression of not only FT, but also Beijing and Moscow’ in the years to come.
Today is the national constitution day. May 3. It marks the 70th anniversary since our current constitution ‘Made by USA’ made a debut in the ruins of over 66 heavily bombed Japanese cities, leaving two million without a home.
I will not celebrate this day like other flock of sheep without balls, nor raise the Japanese flag.
The highly hypocritical ruling party LDP is yet to accomplish the revision of the contentious ‘article 9’ of the 1946 constitution in which they promised back in 1955. PM Abe and his comrades argue the need to do so ostensibly, but are not really serious about it, since it is by far easier and less risky to remain as the ‘dog on a leash’ – Trump Doggy , that is.
It is proven by the fact you hardly see LDP MP’s addressing the need to amend article 9 out in the open public, like Shibuya and Shinjuku.
LDP is not serious about it, nor are its citizens. So if you work for PLA or the Chinese Communist Party, don’t miss the chance, or you’ll regret it.
Dear readers, I’m by no means downplaying the Whitehorse. All I’m stressing is the need for Tokyo to beef up its sovereignty and military capability to face FT and its communist allies.
Because if we continue our ridiculous subservient attitude towards the US (since the present constitution came to effect on this very day, 70 years ago) , it will endanger not only the land of the rising sun but the ‘bankrupt’ United States of America itself.
‘Please defend us American mommy!’ – that’s been the orthodox, shameful attitude of the Japanese after WW2.
Boy, do we ever grow up.
Fat turd Kim Jong un’s mother was born in Osaka.
Bruce Springsteen was born in America.
The moment Trump or Kim launches a pre-emptive strike on its adversary, some serious consequences will occur. All Tokyo Disneyland, Universal Studios Osaka and Ko Young hee’s birthplace may be obliterated.
But probably that’s only when Tokyo will retain its genuine independence.
Or is post war Japan itself an American joke fellas?!
Let’s wait and see.
Japan Broadcasting – Editor in Chief
Pundits across the globe are warning the citizens of Tokyo, Seoul and the G7 nations that the ‘dinner is ready’.
Exuberant Trump is ready for a pre-emptive strike on North Korea, they all say, which to me is no surprise.
But wait a minute.
Who’s going to be the ‘victor’ of this upcoming war?! Asaad? No. Mao Asada (Japanese Olympian Skater that retired yesterday)? No. Putin San? No. Mr Xi?! Absolutely not.
Ruthless Kim Jong un vs relentless Trump. It’s highly unlikely they’ll have a ‘hamburger lunch’ anytime soon, but instead a ‘Hamburger – Kimchi War’ could begin in a blink of an eye considering the fact USS Carl Vinson is already on a stand by in Sea of Japan.
Toshiba duped by an American phoney Westinghouse Electric
The viral video of FAA officials forcing an American citizen (not an illegal immigrant) Mr David Dao on UA Flight 3411 was merely repugnant.
Westinghouse Electric’s CEO Danny Roderick who filed for bankruptcy recently was another fraudulent phoney that de facto ‘eradicated’ its parent company Toshiba.
The management of Toshiba were not only dumb, but critically complacent as to be victimized by phoney Roderick’s cold blooded charade.
Since I have no bigotry, I am well aware of the fact that there are quite a few good hearted Americans on its soil. But at the same time those covered on western mainstream medias are usually phoneys and ‘pathological liars’ to my knowledge.
Trump pledged ‘America First’ and won the votes. After 100 days in office, we’ve learned that he’s doing exactly the opposite. Bombing Syria, and next Pyongyang. You call his recent moves ‘World Policeman USA’.
Of course I do not condone the North Korean authoritarian regime nor its biggest communist ally. That being said, Trump’s pressure on Xi Jinping in Florida a couple of days ago was a prudent one.
But is he actually going to wage a bloody ‘Hamburger – Kimchi’ battle?!
If Heinz made ketchup is the ‘blood’ , then the color of Korean chilly is also the same. I was stunned when I visited Pan Munjon – or the 38th parallel about a decade ago that it was only 40 kilometers from Myongdong, the core shopping center in Seoul.
So if the battle does begin, the South Koreans including the incarcerated beauty Ms Pak Geun hye are likely to fall prey to the Kim Jong un invasion to say the least.
Japan on the other hand may also suffer, with Kim’s unpredictable Nodong missiles presumably crushing into Roppongi or Kyoto or Miyajima. Who knows?!
I am pretty wary and skeptical of the ‘100 % accuracy’ of the so called the US built THAAD system. It is super pricey(unsurprisingly $ billions) , and better be ultra hi tech, but still when Pyongyang fires 30 missiles towards Tokyo Tower it is unthinkable that they’ll be all shot down.
And if the accuracy is just 50%, then it will prove that THAAD is a total failure falling far short of what it’s worth.
It will surely be an embarrassing moment for the Pentagon as well.
Japan has no nukes, but instead invented ‘Doraemon’- a super hi tech cat like robot from the 22nd century after WW2.
This ‘cat’ is 1000 times well equipped compared to Mr Tom ‘impossible’ Cruise. If you don’t believe me, please just google it. You’ll know why.
Doraemon is a huge international sensation across Asia. Thais love him, as well as the Chinese and the Koreans. Controversial UA flight’s Mr Dao was depicted as ‘disruptive and belligerent ‘ – according to the CEO of the embattled aviation company. But that usage is blatantly incorrect, while Kim and Trump perfectly matches that depiction, cynically speaking.
Doraemon’ s amicable character, as well as his ‘Moshimo Box’ shall save our planet from entering WW3. He’ll go inside the phone booth(box) and yell ‘If there were no A Bombs in this world!’ – then the whole crisis shall be over.
What you say inside the Moshimo Box becomes a reality! And if by any chance that doesn’t work, NARUTO shall step in. He’s another Japanese Superhero that can make a huge difference in world affairs, to my knowledge. And my pure wish is, ladies and gents….. have ‘Tokyo’ play the crucial role of NARUTO- a funny but super powerful Samurai who loves Ramen( instant type too).
But in conclusion, that’s definitely a ‘mission impossible’ unfortunately, I must admit. Our cowardly, unthinking pacifist constitution set up back in 1946 is somehow still widely effective till this very day, depriving our citizens of the indispensable Samurai Bushido spirit to stand up when needed.
Our subservient attitude towards Washington is a huge surprise even to quite a few Americans friends I know of. If the British mock themselves as the ‘panting puppy’ of the Whitehouse, so are we. In that sense, Trump was perfectly correct when he pointed out during last year’s Presidential election that Japan shall find a way to defend itself against Pyongyang, instead of counting on the US – especially when the Japan-American 1960 defense treaty is hilariously ‘one sided’.
You foreign readers of this blog shall be appalled to actually read that in our ‘1946 constitution’ made by Big Mac or Douglas McArthur, it stipulates that ‘the belligerency of the state shall never be maintained’.
I’m not joking fellas, it’s true.
UA flight’s David Dao’s belligerency : 5%
Donald Trump’s belligerency: 75%
Kim Jong un’s belligerency: 90%
Japan’s belligerency: 0%
OMG, isn’t it ridiculous. Maggie, Maggie Thatcher ma’am can you hear me?!
What are we waiting for?! A missile strike by Mr Hamburger of Kimchi-Fatty or Doraemon?!
No, to be honest, NARUTO is whom I count on the most.
Come! I’ll cook a really yummy pork based doro-doro Ramen for you, with tons of garlic! Of course it’s a dream never come true. He’ll never appear.
Japan Broadcasting. net Editor in Chief
Mt.Fuji is the most classic, aesthetic and symmetric mountain in the world as far as I know. And it is proven by the mere fact that it’s beauty is renowned not only domestically, but also internationally.
“Harumafuji” and “Terunofuji” are both distinguished Mongolian SUMO wrestlers, though their name includes the word ‘FUJI’.
And yesterday, the new Yokozuna or Grand Champion Kisenosato crushed Terunofuji twice to win the Spring SUMO tournament, according to the Associated Press. Its’ truly a little surprise that AP has posted this article on Japan’s indigenous ‘sport’ – which I must say is in a way an incorrect term, since SUMO is NOT precisely a sport but a Shinto ritual that roots back 1500 years ago.
If you are a foreigner, you may wonder “Boy, aren’t these FATTYS obese! Eating too much rice bowls and ramens?”.
Well, I do not deny that. But remember, these boys are not just a fatty like Mr Michael Moore, but DO have huge muscles and they also train their body (especially the hip-joint between the legs) to make it extremely soft in order to prevent serious injuries.
People in North Korea are purportedly eating shoes.
ASICS? NIKE? Onizuka Tiger?! Adidas?! Who knows. Malnutrition seems rampant, since their authoritarian regime is keen on flooding 90% of its annual budget into its nuclear missile program. Not enough food on the table, and its citizens are skin and bones.
But there’s just one exception. Yes, the “Fatty” Sumo-wrestler-like guy, Kim Jong un.