By Samurai Yujiro Taniyama, FIFA World Cup 2026 reporter – Japan Broadcasting.net Corporation
Zico, Ronaldinho and teenyboppers of São Paulo all in bucket of tears.
Earthshaking the planet, Japan’s mediocre soccer team inexplicably smashed the ingenious heavyweight Brazil 3-2 yesterday.
Despite the fact that it was just a ‘friendly match’, the scale and consequence of last night’s event in Tokyo was perhaps tantamount to Mohammed Ali losing to Cary Grant in ‘To Catch a Thief’.
Hark, isn’t Mrs. Grace Kelly in the 1955 film prodigious!
At any rate, the prudent reader ought to please bear in mind that the ‘Samurai Blue’ overpowered football greats Spain and Germany in FIFA World Cup three years ago, causing major embarrassment for Don Quixote and Lorelei.
That was in 2022.
And today (or yesterday, pricisely) in 2025, the Ronins of sheer mediocrity vanquished the feijoada-mongering Canarinho, the ‘Little Canary’ of Brazil – the unbeatable and the ‘unacceptable’ five time FIFA World Cup champions.
The latter better start considering consumption of raw fish with shoyu-soy sauce and wasabi, urgently. Worrisome issues are plenty for the Italian manager Ancelotti.
In conclusion, let me say this laity and gentlemen. According to my rather nationalistic view without the slightest impartiality, the Land of the Rising Mediocrity will next lacerate the bankrupt Argentinians and become the first Asian nation to lift the FIFA World Cup.
Go ‘soft power Superpower!’. Dribble like Tsubasa!
